Out Of Vogue

The guys hanging around Juan Carlos’s coffee cart felt a level of sophistication rise over the Bronx this morning.

Word on the streets placed Alex Rodriguez – who was born just across the Harlem River in Washington Heights and now resides on the hot corner at East 161st Street and River Avenue – on the cover of Men’s Vogue.

None of the guys have ever read the publication, but they all sense that it is quite sophisticated. Jose is the only one who can actually recall seeing a copy of the magazine.

“I remember it from a barbershop a few years ago,” Jose says. “It looked a little, well, fancy so I didn’t pick it up.”

A Yankee on the cover changes everything.

“I bought a copy of Men’s Health last week just because there was an article on Derek Jeter,” Jose explains. “I’m a sucker for anything about a ballplayer so I’ll have to get this Men’s Vogue, too.”

But a search of neighborhood newsstands turned up nothing.

“Nobody even carries that magazine around here,” Jose says. “Marco over on Gerard Avenue thought I was some kind of sissy just for asking about it.

“I told him A-Rod is on the cover and he calmed down,” Jose continues. “He promised to ask his supplier about it, but I’ll also make sure and keep my eyes open when I go downtown.”

This bit of sophistication is coming to the Bronx one way or another.

“No,” Jose shoots. “The Bronx and A-Rod are bringing sophistication to Men’s Vogue.”

He winks and smiles and then adds:

“You’re welcome.”